The BIG Swoon Reveal!

The day has finally come - I can share my biggest finish with you all!  That's right - my Swoon is done and dusted!  I managed to bind it on the weekend, and Saturday night, got my little minions to work, using muscles they never thought they had.  This baby is HEAVY!  I could have waited for delightful sunshine and dry skies - but you wouldn't have seen photos of it for about a month - Melbourne's Winter is in full force at present!  So, without further ado - here she is - "Swoon".....

Bella the cat appreciates a good quilt when she sees one.

Minion's muscles fading fast.  I LOVE how the pieced back shines.  And I LOVE the fact that you can hardly tell where I have joined the prints!

But most of all, I LOVE the beautiful quilting that Jeanette over at Gone Aussie Quilting did for me!  This is the first time I have sent a quilt away to be quilted.  It took me days of looking at digital designs, making a short list, and then asking my quilty friends for their votes, before I went with this vine design.  It is literally PERFECT in every sense.  I didn't want a dense quilting pattern, I wanted it to skim over the blocks and not take away from their brilliance.  I think my choice has achieved that!

And here it is on our queen size bed.  I took a gazillion 50 photos that night, but thought I would spare you!  I could sit and look at this quilt all day, but alas, I have other quilts to make now.

Through the process of making my Swoon, I've had many people ask me if it is a difficult pattern?  My answer?  It really is a fairly simply pattern to make.  It is made up of HST's and Geese, and a bunch of squares and rectangles.  The cutting for the blocks is a little tedious, but once I made the first block, I then worked on three blocks at a time, chain piecing them to make the process run smoother.  The blocks then came together relatively quickly.  In fact, I made all nine blocks in around four days.  Yes, they were big days, but it's very do-able!

In the details:  Machine pieced and machine bound.  SIZE - The finished size of the pattern is 80" x 80", I made my sashing 5" wide, which brought the finished size up to 90" x 90".  As you can see, that is plenty big for a queen size bed!  It will shrink up a few inches on its first wash, and will still be big enough.  FABRIC - I used Notting Hill by Joel Dewberry.  I bought the entire fat quarter collection - which you can still get HERE, HERE and HERE (just to name a few!).  This pattern is perfect for fat quarters - you only need 18 in total.  QUILTING - Jeanette from Gone Aussie Quilting is situated in New South Wales.  I posted the front and back to her, and she supplied the batting.  She has a TONNE of digital designs to choose from for her edge to edge service.  And she has a fabulous special price for quilting Swoon quilts.  And she's also super quick!  If you're in the USA, there is a special quilting offer for edge to edge quilting from a lady in New York.  If you join the Swooning on a Hop Along Flickr group HERE you will find that offer too.  And if you want to buy the pattern for yourself, you can find it HERE.

So.  Where to now?  More quilting I guess!

I'm linking up with Sew Cute Tuesday AND Show & Tell Tuesday - You can too!

Raising a Child Takes A Village - Raising a Child with Social Media Involved Takes An Army.

If you've been around these parts for a while, you will know that I am partial to putting on my ranty pants.  I get my knickers in a knot about all kinds of interesting bullshit - but mostly about teenagers and the way things are today.

Enter today's post.

I think I'm doing an OK job as a parent.  I think that my eldest son's Dad and I, together with my husband and his Dad's partner, are banding together in some kind of strange unity to get him through these revolting teenage years.  If someone had of told me ten years ago that we would be working together, I would have laughed hysterically.  But a couple of months ago, when our son decided it was time to "up the ante" and test the proverbial waters, we all joined forces to SHUT THAT SHIT DOWN.

And it's worked.  So far.

What I AM struggling with, is being aware of everyone else's children.  Being aware of what they're up to, the shit they're getting in to.  And their parents being oblivious to it.  Hey, I'm not saying I'm perfect - clearly not.  It took almost six months for us to find out that our son had been feeding us bullshit sandwiches!  But in relation to social media - I'm on it.  I'm on his back - always have been, always will be.  We have explained to him what is and what is not acceptable when on social media applications.  That "liking" photos of scantly clad women with derogatory memes or FB pages called "Straya C*nt" not only offends me at times, it also shows up on all his other friends news feeds - including his grandmothers........ and that is NOT acceptable.  We have explained to him that just because a 15 year old girl has the username "Infinity_whore" (yes, you read that correctly), does not mean that it is OK.  It in fact means that she is not only degrading herself, she is allowing others to think it's OK to use such derogatory terms.  NOT OK.

I could go on.  And on.  And on.  I have so many tales to tell about instances we have had to pull him up and educate him on how we expect him to be using social media.  And how it doesn't matter whether other parents let their children use it - or in a lot of cases - don't give a shit about how their children use it.  What matters is how HE uses it.

I digress.  The reason I chose to write AGAIN about this, today, is because I have found myself in yet another quandary in regards to knowing about a child's behaviour and trying to decide whether or not to let said child's parents know?  I know the parents, from many years ago, but we are not friends as such.  I have stewed on the information for a couple of weeks now, debating how I would divulge the information?  Would I want to know if it were my young teenage daughter?  Would I want to hear it from someone else?  I put it out there late last night to my FB friends, and the resounding answer was YES.

So this morning I have been stewing further, going over several different drafts in my head, and have put it down in a FB message to before-mentioned Mother.  I am still yet to send it.

Earlier this year, I wrote this status on my personal FB page, after reading THIS post on MamaMia:

"Some of you already know this, but to everyone else - I will contact you if I see your kids posting inappropriately on social media, or if they're younger, just letting you know that their settings are public when perhaps you would like them to be private. I'm hoping you'd all do the same! Social media can be used so wonderfully - to engage with people in a wonderful way - it's such a shame that it gets used so shitfully at times. xx"

And a whole lot of friends agreed to do the same.  In the past couple of years, I've messaged, phoned and emailed parents when I've come across something I feel is either inappropriate or potentially dangerous with regard to their children.  It is always received gratefully, and in some instances, the parents have had absolutely no idea what Facebook or Instagram even are.

My best piece of advice?  Become an expert.  An expert on social media.  Learn how to use all forms of it.  And check in on your children.  See what they are "following", "liking" and laughing at.  Because without your direction and knowledge, they are trying to learn for themselves what is right and wrong.  They are learning from other kids, who possibly don't know what they're doing either.  Social media is a whole new world in terms of parenting.  I was trying to work out what to compare it to - but I've come up with nothing.  Nothing compares to the murky waters that social media has presented to us as parents.  And I hate to think that anything ever will.

Are you navigating the murky waters of teenagers and social media?  How's it working for you?

Sign Of The Times?

Do you remember when you were growing up and you'd hear your grandparents say "Back in my day...." or your parents say "when I was a girl....."?  Do you remember rolling your eyes and thinking "yeh, yeh" and wondering what all the fuss was about?  Thinking that all of them were just old fogies who had no idea about what you were going through, about the type of world you were growing up in?  And thinking "when I'm a parent, I'm NEVER going to be like that!"?  Well, I feel like I'm in a never-ending version of that complete paragraph at present!

One word - Teenagers.

I want to know what on earth has happened in the 20 years since I finished being a teenager?  Since when did it become OK to do everything that it wasn't OK to do when I was a teenager?  Have I really been living under a rock BOULDER???  I don't think I'm naive, I don't think I'm a fuddy duddy, in fact I think I'm a pretty COOL MUM.  But if the teenage years get more eventful and more testing the older they get - I could lose my cool.....

At 14 years of age, I had only just relinquished my Barbie dolls, started filling out a bra and was not remotely interested in sex.  Don't get me wrong - I had a pulse, and hormones, so I knew the opposite sex existed - I just wasn't interested nor prepared to get involved in anything more than a kiss.

Fast forward to 2013........where 13 year olds think it's OK to drop the F bomb in front of their friends' Mum.  Where parents think it's ok for the same age girls to roam the streets after 5pm, hang out with boys unsupervised and wear the most ridiculously skimpy clothes known to man.  Morals are thrown out the window (or maybe they're just not taught?), restrictions on phone calls don't exist (can you imagine calling someone at 11pm back in 1988?) and writing on FB that you're on the phone to your "sexy boyfriend".  13.  THIRTEEN.

You may have guessed what I'm dealing with?  I thought the fact I had to go and borrow the "Where do I come from" book last week, for the younger members of the family, was enough sex talk for at least a month, but apparently not.  It seems my world has now become one of repetitive conversations about what is appropriate and/or inappropriate behaviour.  

Remember this little gem of a book?

The expectations I have as a parent are pretty simple - I thought?  But I'm slowly realising that perhaps my expectations are completely out of whack with the time I'm living in?  A certain someone said to me today that he was "glad he doesn't have daughters".  And I replied that I was glad I did, because I will teach my daughters (and my sons!) morals, self-esteem and love.  That my daughters will have a slew of restrictions of what/how they can and cannot wear, do, say and behave.  And that there will be consequences for the choices they make in their lives.  Am I really being THAT unrealistic to think that I can have so much input in to how my children are going to turn out?  Do I have to just give in to the fact that times have changed and expectations appear to be somewhat lowered?

I'm doing my best.  I'm having VERY open and honest conversations on a very regular basis.  I'm ensuring the teenager is informed and protected.  But I feel like I'm going "against the tide" so to speak.

Do you have teenagers?  Do you have expectations?  Discuss!

Too School for Cool?

The discussion going on in our household (and work, and on the phone) is about schools.  To my shock and amazement (and relief), Lochie's Dad told me Sunday night that he was not thrilled with his school and that he would be looking for another school.  I did answer that perhaps WE should look for another school, and perhaps talk about it??  Anywho, after a brief discussion on all things uncool about Lochie's school, we agreed to look into some alternate educational solutions for our almost 14 year old. Which translates to - I spent the week looking into some alternate educational solutions for our almost 14 year old, then shared this information with Lochie's Dad.

I spent a couple of hours on line looking through Catholic school websites.  I sent messages and chatted to friends who have children at said schools, questioning their happiness with the education provided and also querying the terrifying price (OK, not so terrifying, but certainly thousands more than we are paying now) we would have to pay to get a better education?  And I then called schools only to find out that they have waiting lists.....

Sooooo, this week I will be photocopying reports and filling out application forms, trying to say all the right things, in the hope that my intelligent young son will gain a place at a school that will not tolerate the type of classroom behaviour my son's current school seemingly does.  I will then sit on the edge of my seat for the following months wondering if I wrote down all the right things and whether his great reports (in my unbiased eyes) are good enough for him to be allowed a better education?  And if he DOES gain entry into one of those schools, I will then panic about always being able to pay the fees required to keep him at a school that offers more than what he is getting at present?

What has become clear to me, and many parents I have spoken to, is that you really don't know what a school is like until your children are actually attending.  Which, I guess, is the same as life in general?  You don't know what people are like, until you get to know them.  You don't know what a job is like, until you're working it.  And you don't know what the future holds, until you're living it.

Have you had to change your kid's schools part-way through their education?  Do you think we need to set the bar higher in terms of Government school expectations?  Discuss.....

Smart Chart

After what I would call GIVING UP on Monday, it seems my brainy husband put some thought to the situation we had found ourselves in - again.

Last year, our youngest son, Cadyn, went through a pretty hideous time.  He hit a wall at school, which then reverberated through our home, as he hit not only walls but anything else he could possibly cry at, throw himself on the ground at or yell at.  It was a living hell.  We ended up getting some great help for him, and he was assessed for a number of things.  Turns out he is one of the millions in the world who suffers from lives with anxiety.  I crossed out the suffering part because I don't like to think that his life is going to be full of suffering - so we'll try to help him to live with it instead....

Back to Monday......It had become very apparent, blatantly obvious actually, that Cadyn's anxiety had raised its ugly head again.  Who would have thought?  A new home, new school, new friends, ongoing renovations etc etc would be enough to do anyone's head in - but throw in some anxiety - and whallah! Melt-down!  Cue the giving up part.  Andrew was at the end of his tether too.  Except instead of him throwing his hands up in the air and crying, like someone I know, he must have stayed awake Monday night, and by the morning told me he had a plan.  Fabulous.  He would go to work and get together a routine/chores chart - with incentives.  Cool.

We have done rewards charts in the past.  With varying success.  But one thing we know about Cadyn is that he is rather goal orientated.  So why not give it another crack?  Later that morning, Andrew emailed me his "first draft".  I did giggle.  Past reward charts have been put together with some poster paper, textas, a ruler and some star stickers.  Nooooooo, not this one.

It's a spread sheet.........

I gave him a little of my input, but basically left it up to him to sort out.  What we were presented with (and I do not say presented lightly - it was a boardroom presentation, with the dining room being our boardroom - I was President) was a very well thought up and executed spread sheet.  On very big size paper.  Laminated.  Impressive.

Andrew dives in to his spiel explaining the dynamics of said chart and asks for the kid's participation.  Cadyn and Chelsea both eagerly start reading out the different parts of the chart, whilst I stood behind Andrew giggling at his spread sheet genius.  I did stop and ask the kids if they actually understood what the word "dispute" meant?  Nope.  A few small explanations later and the charts made perfect sense - even Chloe had some sort of idea!

One point I did dispute, was the monetary value put on receiving a day full of ticks - with no crosses (very technical).  Each child has the opportunity to earn a dollar for every day they achieve all of their possible ticks.  I queried Andrew's maths abilities and asked him if he realised how much money that adds up to over a four week period for four kids?  $112!!!!!!!!!!  He reassured me there was no way that all four kids could achieve perfection for four weeks in a row.  We shall see.

Our new system was rolled out Tuesday night.  And much to my amazement, there has been an almost full 360 degree turn around!  I have children offering their services left, right and centre.  I see the mechanics ticking over in their little heads as they begin to dispute argue/annoy me, before stopping themselves in their tracks and reverting to angels.  I am certain we will not be sent bankrupt by our scheme, but I am also very certain that it's something we will be sticking with.  Oh, and I CANNOT WAIT to see the look on Lochie's almost 14 year old face when he sees his delightful chart stuck on his wall when he returns from his Dad's house this week!

So - how do you reign in your kid's behaviours?  Are you a poster paper or spread sheet kind of parent?

Whose Bright Idea??

Was it to get another farking cat???!!!!  And who was the farking idiot that agreed to it????  Urghhhhh.......

SOMEBODY began campaigning for a kitten back in April.  This somebody had been suckered in by his then soon to be nine year old daughter and her promises of caring and loving a kitten like no other human being in history had before her.  The same somebody then convinced me that it would be a great idea to get above mentioned daughter a kitten for her birthday.  A series of events occurred that ultimately ended in us getting a kitten for free, which we then surprised said daughter with as an early birthday present.....

I will admit that the cuteness of this little black puff-ball was so huge that it didn't take long for me to fall in love with her.  In fact, I wrote quite positively about our Ms Bella's arrival HERE.  Oh, how times change.....

 Fast forward to today, when I entered good old Pets Paradise for the umpteenth time since Bella's arrival, looking to spend yet another small fortune on crappola.  Today's purchase (thankfully at half price, not so thankfully because poor Pets Paradise is in receivership - whoops) was ANOTHER scratching post (because the same birthday girl decided it would be a good idea to sit on the first $50 scratching post, causing it to snap in half - sigh) in an attempt to divert Bella's attention from the gorgeous new lounges we bought only one month ago.

I also asked the question - "Do you have anything to spray on furniture or fittings to stop cats wrecking shit?"  The young girl said "no".   Oh.  Thanks.  For.  Nothing.  

But wait!  As I was about to walk off, she said they had something called "sticky paws".....ummmmm.  I followed her to the wall display where there was ONE packet of sticky paws left.  I was also followed by another woman who had overheard my request and was interested in finding a solution for her own damaged home.  What I discovered was that cats apparently do not like sticky surfaces!  So this solution is a trumped up version of double sided tape, which you can stick to any surface you do not wish your cat or kitten to demolish!  I snapped up the last packet (and did not look the other woman in the eyes for fear of being glared at) and went and paid for my bargain scratching post and sticky paws.  Sounds so wrong....

"Don't declaw....get sticky paws" - WTF??  Who declaws a cat?  

So this afternoon's quest was to cover my brand new, but already slightly tattered lounge in double sided tape.  During said quest I discovered that not only had the little shit of a cat (hear the love in my words?) attacked the corners of the lounge, she has given the whole side of it a good crack.  Little focker.....

I also sticky paw'd the side of the step that had been nibbled and clawed at.  I'm wondering if I could just cover the whole freaking house in double sided tape so the little turd can't wreck anything else??  Maybe the poor singular pot plant I own?  Yep, she's managed to almost kill that too!

Don't get me wrong.  I am not opposed to pets.  I  AM an animal lover.  But each and every time we get a new pet, I end up doing a lot of sighing, yelling, cursing and quite simply - regretting.

Our menagerie now consists of Bella - the now sticky paw'd kitten.  Ruby - the ten year old cat who it seems has decided will hiss at anything and anyone she pleases.  Tanza - the 11 year old corgi x bichon AND Hamish - the teeny tiny three year old toy poodle, who refused to toilet train and to this day will still cock his leg on anything he can possibly reach if let inside.  So he is now an outdoor dog and what you would call a Rasta Poodle.....just needs some reggae and a joint....

I digress.....  Tonight as I was picking up the cat food that Bella had so delightfully dragged on to the carpet to eat, I yelled out "I hate this fucking cat".......to which Andrew retorted "You hate all cats"....  Ummmm....... Look, I'm trying ok.

How on earth do people have patience to get past the kitten trials and tribulations?  Are all kittens bat-shit crazy, or just Bella?

Sweating my way to Health

Yesterday, I finally took the plunge and committed to doing a Bikram Yoga class.  I took the commitment one step further, and posted on Facebook my intention, so that I could not back out of it, and would have to answer to lots of people if I did!  Including the instructor, whom I happen to be friends with.  For those of you who have no idea what I am talking about, here's the dictionary.com explanation.....

This would also be classed as the 

BIGGEST UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE CENTURY.  

I leapt crawled out of bed at 6.40am and dragged on some of my gym gear from years gone by.  Put a couple of extra layers on because I knew I would freeze my arse off.  Jumped in the car and made the 20 minute drive to get to a 7.30 class on time.

Was greeted by the lovely Mish (instructor) who was impressed to see I had kept my word and actually turned up.  She gave me some quick instructions and directed me in to the class room.

BANG - smacked in the face by the 39 degree heatwave.  And fear.

Took my place at the back of the room, and was pleased to see that I was joined by another first timer - Matthew - who was a rather "burly" looking bloke, who had a strange look of fear on his face also...

Next thing i knew, it was show time!  I somehow managed to remember to breath, and managed to get through the first few poses (DON'T think Madonna).  Then my body starting reacting to numerous factors:  

1.  It was early morning and I had not eaten breakfast - I am a creature of habit and usually eat as soon as I wake up.

2.  I had clearly not drunk even close to enough fluids yesterday to have any sort of decent hydration.

3.  I was just a widdle widdle bit out of my depth!

But I DID soldier on.  Whenever I felt the need to pass out, I just quietly slid to the floor and sat for a minute.  Whenever I felt the need to throw up, I just quietly slid to the floor and sat for a minute.  Paints a pretty picture yes?

Ninety minutes later -  I was done.  I survived.  And I felt pretty bloody proud of myself!!  I looked over to my new mate Matthew and said if I could actually move I would hi-five him.  He retorted that he would cut his hand off and throw it in my direction....

I have thought about doing Bikram Yoga for a few years now.  Have spoken to a few people about it, but never got the feeling it was something I wouldn't be able to manage.  Now that I have conquered that first class, I know what will work better for me next time.  I know, I know - I'm a nut bag for even talking about the next time...

Next time, I will go to a day time or evening class - when I have had plenty of energy food throughout the day and plenty of fluids.  And next time, I will be better prepared - mentally.  Because I will know what to expect.

Why am I doing this?  Well, the medication I was prescribed by my lovely neurologist, to help my daily headaches and regular migraines, worked wonders.  BUT (pardon the pun) it also helped to increase the size of my arse.  So I am trying to find a better, healthier option to managing and hopefully eliminating the pain that is my head.  Fingers crossed that all the pain I am going to put myself through, sweating like mad, will be beneficial for not only my head, but everywhere else!

Have you done Bikram Yoga?  Have I convinced you that it could be a good thing?

A Likely Witch Hunt

Happy Mother's Day!  I worked all day but was happy to return home  to a lovely Indian meal cooked by the husband, and the children had all made and bought me lovely bits and pieces.  Nice.


What I didn't think was nice, was the not so brilliant timing of 60 Minutes' story telling.  I mean seriously, putting a story on about smacking, on Mother's Day.  Good one.  I saw the ads for it last week, and straight away thought "fabulous, that woman is going to get roasted".  I'm always curious as to why people would put themselves out there, in the public arena, to be torn to shreds?


Just to clarify - I am NOT anti-smacking.  I am NOT pro-smacking.  I am PRO-PARENTING.  This is my take on it all....


I am not a perfect parent.  Far from it.  I have smacked my kids - on the VERY rare occasion.  It's usually out of frustration.  And I ALWAYS feel guilty after I have done it.  Hence why it has rarely occurred.  Watching the story this evening, I cringed.  This Mum, whom I am certain loves her four children dearly, smacks on a rather regular basis.  My opinion is that if you are smacking your children often, and on a regular basis - it's NOT working.  It's NOT effective.  Change your tact.  Clearly this Mum thinks she is doing the right thing.  And you know what?  That's for her to live with.  I can only imagine that she is now going to go through hell - because every anti-smacker on the earth is going to want her blood.  They will be gunning for her.  And that is unfortunate.


We all parent the only way we know how.  I USED to yell.  Until a few weeks ago.  Things are different in our household now.  I am relishing the random hugs, kisses and "I love you's".  A few days ago, I lost my shit for the first time since then.  And as I raised my voice and lost my temper, my eyes were open.  I saw the way my kids were looking at me.  And I remembered why I stopped yelling.  Their eyes were sad.  I stopped and apologised.


I'm hoping that the Mum from tonight's story watched tonight, and that her eyes were open.  I'm hoping that she saw the looks on her kids faces, and their body language.  And I hope that she learns from it.  I also hope that the wider audience and the media are kind, because after all - she's a Mum, just like the rest of us.  


Did you watch tonight?  Thoughts?

Breathing not Yelling

Hi...my name is Midge and it has been three days since I have yelled at my kids!!  And I'm feeling rather good about it!  Not only that, but I also caught up with a beautiful friend this morning, who has been going through a really tough time with her littlest boy enduring a shitty few weeks with an infection in his leg - that went septic.  I've shed tears for her and her little boy these last few days.  Nobody likes to see a little person go through so much pain.  I'm so glad that he is going to be ok.  And I'm so glad that I could lend a shoulder today.  We talked about my blog post the other day and I had one of those "ahh-haa" moments.  Letting it all out has enabled me to reflect.  Sort of like working out why on earth I was doing all of that yelling?  Still don't have all the answers, but was able to note some subtle changes since then.....

Whilst not yelling at my children, I have been breathing.  Literally.  Example - this afternoon Chloe decides she would like to take the hair ties box, a decent sized My Little Pony and a hair brush with her in the stroller to school pick up - as You do.  I tell her that she's not taking the hair ties and the tears start (hers, not mine) the feet get ready to stomp, and it's at about this time I usually open my lungs and let rip.  Nope.  Not today.  I took a few breaths and tried to reason with her.  Compromise is my new best friend.  She is calmed with the knowledge she can take the damn pony and brush.  Phew.

Whilst not yelling at my children I have spent some time with them.  I picked Chels and Cadyn up from school yesterday afternoon and we went to the shopping centre.  I bought them a slurpee when they asked - they were in shock.  I let them act like fools whilst I earnestly tried on dresses in the fitting rooms at Myer.  Cadyn commented on one dress telling me I looked nice.  Nice.  I'm trying really hard to choose my battles a little more wisely.  This is advice I was given many years ago, and sometimes forget.  I mean really, if wrestling on the ground outside the change rooms is going to allow me to get what I need to get done, and they're not hurting anyone (except their ears) then why bother trying to make them sit still??

Whilst not yelling at my children I have asked them very politely to go about a few chores.  They have been doing them, with very minimal huffing and puffing or eye-rolling.  Cadyn was having trouble with the broom this morning, so I offered to take over and whilst trying to get beside the lounge I picked up Chloe's little play stroller and flung it over the other side of the room.  Cadyn asked me if I was angry?  It's moments like those that make my stomach drop.  My kids think I'm angry.  I told him I wasn't angry, I was just moving the stroller in a rather quick way!

Whilst I haven't been yelling at my children, I have noticed I'm getting some serious lovin' from them.  Chelsea popped her arm around me whilst we were walking through the shops yesterday.  Cadyn has been giving me random hugs.  Chloe is the same little 3 year old who is possibly too young to figure out that Mummy is trying something different!  And Lochie arrives back from his Dad's tomorrow, so will probably think he is entering the Twilight Zone.....


So it looks like I'm on track with my plan!  Not only did I have a REALLY good talk, I went for my first run in months tonight!  Which means I will most likely not be able to walk for the next couple of days.....

Look, I'm not perfect (don't tell my husband I said that - I like him to believe I am).  Never will be.  But I'm trying!!! 

The one where I sound like my Nanna.....

Today was parent/teacher interview day at Lachlan's high school.  He rang me from his Father's last week and said that his Dad thinks because his test scores etc were so good, he didn't have to go to the interviews.  I did not agree with this.  Lochie went forward and arranged for the interviews.

For those not familiar with high school - at this school, your child goes to each teacher and fills in a form with a ten minute slot for your interview.  He gained four slots for me, one after the other - good boy!  This meant the process would be done and dusted in 40 minutes.  Fab.

So the time arrives and we head off to school.  Get there right on time for Japanese teacher.  Now, I wrote last year of Lachlan's eagerness to learn Japanese.  And how I was astounded that he "got it".  This year - a little different.  He told me a few weeks ago that he was finding it boring.  And not doing so well.  So this was crunch time.  Same teacher as last year greeted me with a familiar smile and got straight to the point.  "Lachlan's working a little differently to last year".  I like a teacher who doesn't pull any punches!  Our interview progressed well, I told her Lachlan's thoughts, whilst he sat prostate in his chair, embarrassed that I had told his teacher he thought it was boring.  But she was very honest and shared some interesting points.....

"Do I have your permission to confiscate his iPod and laptop in class?"   PARDON????  My response to her was one of raised eyebrows, a WTF? look on my face and me sitting forward in my chair.  This is when I went all Nanna......

"What is he doing with his iPod in class?" I ask.  Mrs Japanese enlightens me.  Apparently the school policy on having iPods and phones in class is up to the discretion of the teacher.  PARDON????  Mrs Japanese gathers I am rather entertained by this fact.  I am actually surprised, shocked and disgusted.  She proceeds to fill in the blanks by telling me that whilst she is teaching, children (I will call them children opposed to students, because I want to bang home my Nanna-ness by stating they are bloody CHILDREN!!!) use their laptops to watch movies.  They ignore her directions to hand in their iPods and will question her authority to do so.

By this stage I am rather aghast at the fact that this is all going on in my son's learning environment.  Whilst I'm peeling my jaw off the ground, Lachlan tells Mrs Japanese that he has stopped listening to his iPod in class after she last requested he do so.  He then says "lucky I don't have a bra" and laughs at his little joke.  PARDON????  Another pearler.  The year 8 girls will put their iPods in their bras so the teachers have no choice and cannot confiscate them........  Oh Dear.

I look at this lovely and charming 50-something woman, who must have the patience of a Saint, and give her these words:

"Can you imagine us doing that when we were at school?"

Just as the words were escaping my mouth, I realised I was now old.

Although I left Mrs Japanese feeling disheartened about THE YOUTH OF TODAY, (Yep, old old old old old) I was happy that she assured me Lochie is a great kid who is still doing well.  But clearly his boring thoughts were getting in the way of him excelling.  

The other three interviews were fabulous and made me a very proud Nanna Mum!  

Tell me - are you shocked by what kids are getting away with these days?  And are you a Nanna too?

Frickin Fours

As I type, I'm trying to take deep breaths and resist the urge to scream.  I have just put Chloe (3.5 years old) in to her bed and told her to calm down.  Prior to this, I listened to five minutes of screaming from her.  

And now - silence.  And waiting.  Yep, spoke too soon.  She's moved on to crying.  Some days I think my head is going to explode.

The public consensus is that it's the Terrible Two's parents have to prepare themselves for.  But in this household, it's Frickin Fours.  And it seems this final instalment in my parenting schedule is kicking in early.  My child is turning into the she-devil.

Attributes of a parent child inflicted with the Frickin Fours can include screaming and crying for no reason, screaming and crying for any reason, screaming and crying because you're telling them to stop screaming and crying.  Annoying their older siblings, and trying to get their own way, because for the past few years, said older siblings have given in to child because they were so cute.  No, no, no and more no!  Jumping on the spot yelling no!  Spinning round in circles - yelling no!  You get the picture....

My delicate little flower of a child has turned.  She has more personality than any of my older children had at this age, and she uses it to her advantage.  And I'm spent....

How does a child go from this:

To this?

Picture from www.sarahleavitt.com

In a matter of seconds....

And just to throw me right off the trail....in the time it has taken me to write this post....she has gone to sleep, in her bed, during daylight hours - for the first time in about a year!!!  I give up......

What has been the hardest age so far in your parenting?

Teenager - Part Two

Only a few months ago, I was celebrating a new chapter in this household - we had a teenager in our company.  Fast forward, and I'm wondering why on earth I was celebrating?!?!?!

This past few weeks have brought moments of fear, horror and complete disbelief.  My son is no longer the innocent little man I mistakenly thought he would always be.

      Exhibit A - Driving in our new automobile, which has whiz-bang techno gadgets, and means we have a USB stick full of music that can be played.  Cool right?  Choosing song to play and I hear "Dedication to my ex" from the back seat.  I say "what ex?"......"Mum, it's a song".  Ok then.  I'm getting old.  The next day I remembered the song, so thought I would have a listen.  Mistake.  I nearly crashed the car.  You have more than likely heard the radio edit of this song, but here's the version my husband got from iTunes for the kids......  Dedication to my Ex - Explicit Version!  I just love that Lochie now has that song to sing out loud and proud......not.

      Exhibit B - Driving in my bomb-of-a-car, approximately 8pm.  Advertisement on the radio comes on.  For "Little Horny Devils".....ah----hemmmmmmm.......  It goes a little something like this - "toys that go buzz in the night"!  I'm trying to act like there's no sound in the car at all.  And then it happened.  The giggle. I look at him and ask him what he's laughing about?  "The Ad" he guffaws....... Oh Lord give me strength - he understands the bloody ad....

      Exhibit C - Sitting at our family dinner at an Indian Restaurant on Sunday night.  There's a tv in the restaurant playing the cricket, cos that's how they roll.  Ad comes on (frickin ads!!!) - and Lochie comes out with something about "The Hangover".  It becomes very clear that he has watched the movie.  I am past unimpressed, moving onto furious.  My interrogation begins quite calmly, until it occurs to me that I have next to no control what my 13 year old is doing, watching etc at other people's homes.  This frightens me.  My fear continues until I let loose at him last night.  And these are some of the things I said to him....

"You are 13, you have the rest of your life to watch that shit.

You are a kid, you don't need to watch sex, drugs and whatever else is in that shit.

You are supposed to be responsible and know what I would and wouldn't be happy with you watching."

The list goes on.....  But what it boils down to is this.  I have a teenager.  A teenage boy.  And it scares the shit out of me.  He has always been very responsible, thoughtful and pretty trustful.  But I fear the age of 13 has brought a whole new kettle of fish in to the equation?  I know I can't wrap him up in cotton wool, but there's a whole big world out there, full of things I don't think he's ready or prepared for, and I don't know how to cope with it.

How do you cope with your children moving in to teenage years?

The Slap

Controversy, controversy.....and another tale to tell.  Yesterday, I saw this link on my Facebook newsfeed, so I popped on over to see what it was all about.  Well, if you read that piece, you will find a whole different kind of controversy to what I'm going to talk about.....and one (how old is too old to breastfeed?) I'm not going to get involved in right now.  What this also lead me to, was reading up about the television show this piece was brought up by - "The Slap", which was aired on ABC television Thursday night.  I am actually spewing I didn't know it was on, because I think I would like to see it!

For what it's worth, I'm going to share my two bobs worth when it comes to physically disciplining someone else's child....

Many years ago, when my now on-the-cusp-of-being-a-teenager son was a delightful little four and a bit year old, I was at one of those lovely indoor play centres with a friend and her son, as well as our relatively newborn babies.  Kids were having a great time, climbing as high up as possible, we were having a great time, drinking hot chocolates and chatting.  Right about then, our boys came flying towards up, Lochie screaming at the top of his lungs and his mate talking a million miles an hour.  What we got from the gibberish was that some Mother excuse-for-a-woman had taken it upon herself to smack Lochie!

Now, what happened in the following five minutes could be described as a little crazy, but I was incensed that a total stranger, who calls herself a Mother, could lay a hand on another child.  The thing that made it look even crazier was this woman would not come down from the play equipment!  She was wayyyyyy up high in the equipment, so I HAD to go bat-shit crazy at her from down below!  Gained a little attention as well as horror from the other parents in the centre whilst I was at it....

After realising my fury was not going to make this woman come down, I retreated to my table and was consoled by my gf along with random strangers who were also incensed by what had unfolded.  I could see the object of my fury making her way down to the floor, so readied myself for a confrontation that I really did not think I would ever have to have.  I made my way over to her - new born in one arm so as not to belt her one myself - and ever so calmly asked her what on earth had possessed her to smack my child?  Her response you ask?  "Well, he hit me first"  I KID YOU NOT!  It was about this stage I got in her face and retorted that she was the adult, he was the child, and that NO MATTER WHAT - you should NEVER touch another person's child!  If she had a problem with my child, she should have come and seen ME about it, in an adult fashion - not responded like another four year old and smacked him back.

In the end, I achieved nothing, as she defended her actions and could not see what she did as wrong.  I told her what I thought, in probably less than delightful terms, and she went on her way - leaving the centre with her poor children behind her.

I can honestly say that this incident was one I would prefer never to have happened, but one that I have mentioned in conversations with fellow Mothers when discipline, as a topic, has been raised.

As I said earlier.....I didn't see the first episode of "The Slap", but I'm going to have a search to see if I can view it online, and then give my opinion on that little scenario.

Has anyone else had a similar experience, or am I the only one with nut-cases in play centres?