Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Sharing with strangers....

Approximately 48 hours ago, I ventured to K-mart to make a few purchases for work. Whilst there, I quickly popped up to the layby counter to pop some money on my xmas layby. The lady in front of me was patiently waiting for the adolescent boy behind the counter to sort out some sort of muck up on the phone. I noticed she was buying a DS, so whilst waiting started up some small talk, which in my world always seems to be easy to do - when you start talking about your kids!

After a couple of minutes, this lovely stranger tells me she is having a bad day - to which I genuinely understand and tell her I hope it gets better. She then goes on to say that she had just lost a child a few weeks earlier..............We are both leaning on the service counter, and when she imparts this very personal piece of information, tears well up in my eyes and I just want to hug her. I fear words are going to fail me, but I tell her that I completely understand and that I too had lost a child a couple of years ago. I go on to say that if it makes her feel any better, four months after my husband and I lost our baby, we fell pregnant and my little baby girl has just turned one. She replies ''my husband doesn't want to''. I feel even sadder for this woman I had just met, and can only manage an ''oh no'' in my reply. ''How far along were you?'' she asks, ''13 weeks'' I reply. And then comes the sucker punch of the conversation - ''I was five months pregnant, and had to give birth''...........................

I held in my tears and just told her that I really was so very sad for her, and hoped that she could find some support and that things would get better. But in my heart of hearts, I just didn't know or understand how you could recover from something like that? My miscarriage had left me feeling empty and sad for such a long time - even after conceiving Chloe - and there were times I didn't feel like I would ever get over it. And like this lovely stranger, I felt alone. I had a wonderfully supportive and emotional husband, but didn't feel like anyone I knew truly understood. Sometimes, I wonder what that little baby would look like? Was it a son or a daughter? But I so very lucky to have a beautiful daughter, who would more than likely not be here had that sadness never visited me. And I could never imagine being without her in our lives.

I parted ways with this stranger, feeling like I had known her longer than the five minutes we had spent at a layby counter. She has been in my thoughts for the past 48 hours, and I wonder how she is doing? Whether her day got any better, and if she remembers actually talking to me?

How many of us have had incidental conversations with strangers and thought nothing of it? Even more importantly, how many of us have these same conversations, but are touched by their words?

The few people who were there for me, and for Andrew, during what is most definately the hardest time of our lives - will always be remembered for the ''little'' things they said and did. One friend called and said ''I don't know what to say'' - but it was the fact that she cared to call anyway that meant the world to me!

So I guess today's quote is very appropriate - ''No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted'' - Aesop

And it is never forgotten. x

No comments:

Post a Comment

Thanks for taking the time to leave me a comment - I read each and every one of them! xx

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...